2013 NBA Playoffs – First Round Update

It’s been a little while between updates but there is absolutely no need to fear. We are back now with two stone cold facts to get us started on this review of the NBA Playoffs so far.

Fact #1 – The Los Angeles Lakers suck

Whether it be attributed to under-performing players, mass injury concerns, an ill-minded coach, a selfish future franchise cornerstone, an insane owner or just pure bad luck the Los Angeles Lakers were two things and two things only this season… dysfunctional and hard to watch. The devastating Achilles injury to Kobe Bryant was the rotten cherry on the year-old sundae for a season gone wrong while injuries to Steve Blake, Steve Nash and Jodie Meeks in the first round against the San Antonio Spurs was simply salt in the already gangrenous wound.

Los Angeles were swept by the Spurs and joined the Milwaukee Bucks as the first teams to exit the 2013 postseason. For the Lakers specifically, it was the first time they had been swept in the first round since 1967. Now that’s a deep burn.

Fact #2 – The Miami Heat are going to win the 2013 NBA title

The Miami Heat are the team that not only obliterated the Bucks 4-0 and by an average of over 14 points, they’re also the team that is the polar opposite to the Lakers in terms of injuries, form, coaching stability and well, everything really. As you will see shortly, the road to the NBA Finals is going to be a pretty safe one for the Heaters and when they finally reach a Western Conference opponent for the title, it’s unlikely to be OKC.

All in all, everything is going perfectly for the Heat and barring a catastrophic turn for the worst, they should repeat as champs come June.

Series Reviews – Eastern Conference

1 – Miami vs. 8 – Milwaukee (Miami wins series 4-0)

<insert chalk outline of a deer here>

4 – Brooklyn vs. 5 – Chicago (Chicago leads series 3-2)

Both teams fighting gallantly to the (almost) death to see who gets nut-punched in the next round by Miami. That’s how 95% of the NBA world sees this series and while a triple OT thriller in Game 4 distracted us all momentarily, there’s no reason to believe it isn’t true.

Even with a potential Derrick Rose return to face Miami, neither of these teams take a game off the Heat unless Miami simply loses interest.

3 – Indiana vs. 6 – Atlanta (Indiana leads series 3-2)

If there’s one thing you can count on come the post season, it’s that the Atlanta Hawks will pollute your TV screen for longer than necessary. The good ol’ Hawks are arguably the most boring team in the playoffs to watch and pose very little threat of kidnapping the Larry O’Brien trophy. Conversely, the Indiana Pacers are built to challenge the Miami Heat and after leading this series 2-0 it looked like they were on track to do so again.

Judging by their past two losses however (by an average of 16 points) the Pacers looked far from organised even when they regained control of this series in Game 5. If this team is struggling against the Hawks, again without sounding like a broken record it’s hard to see them match up with the Miami Heat.

2 – New York vs. 7 – Boston (New York leads series 3-2)

While some are writing hopeful columns on the Celtics’ chances to do the impossible, it seems only a matter of time (ie. one more game) before they join their rival Lakers on the sidelines. Boston, and more specifically Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett looked old, slow and defeated after three games. It’s safe to assume they’ll look the same, in a more literal sense after Game 6 but who knows? Some people still believe.

Series Reviews – Western Conference

1 – Oklahoma City vs. 8 – Houston (Oklahoma City leads series 3-1)

WTF… James Harden is awesome… Durant went scoreless for a quarter… all hell is breaking loose… OKC in six.

4 – LA Clippers vs. 5 – Memphis (Memphis leads series 3-2)


It seems the Los Angeles Clippers may have screwed the pooch by dropping an all-important Game 5 in LA. The Memphis Grizz now have it all to play for in Game 6 at home.

Would you bet against Chris Paul though? Genuinely a 50/50 in the next contest…

3 – Denver vs 6 – Golden State (Golden State leads series 3-2)

If this can be replicated at Oracle Arena for Game 6… it’s lights out for Denver.

Serious props to the big Aussie for completely tearing Game 4 a new seat. The Warriors need that every night though for them to competitive, in this round and potentially next.

2 – San Antonio vs 7 – Los Angeles Lakers (San Antonio wins series 4-0)

Nope, not even talking about this one.

Shoutout to Aussies Patty Mills and Aron Baynes though… keep killin’ it balas.


An irrationally addicted follower of all things NBA since 1986. A casual contributor on a website that only has one contributor. Will Photoshop for food and old basketball cards.